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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28837344">Firebloom of the Mind</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/loosenoodlepoodledoodle/pseuds/loosenoodlepoodledoodle'>loosenoodlepoodledoodle</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Meaningful Works [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>(여자)아이들 | (G)I-DLE</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff and Angst, LGBTQ Themes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:47:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,256</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28837344</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/loosenoodlepoodledoodle/pseuds/loosenoodlepoodledoodle</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>People complain about Shuhua's small parts in (G)I-DLE's music. But what might Shuhua think about it?</p>
<p>And what might the others feel about her?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cho Miyeon/Yeh Shuhua</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Meaningful Works [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1672393</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Firebloom of the Mind</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>(G)I-DLE put out another work of art in "HWAA."</p>
<p>Go watch it and feel the feels!</p>
<p>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z3szNvgQxHo</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>                “I don’t get it,” said Yuqi.</p>
<p>                Shuhua looked at the others. Their faces were in broad agreement. She would have to explain it to them.</p>
<p>                “Our Chinese fans are boycotting the album, because of me. They feel slighted that I have such a small part in the song.”</p>
<p>                Soyeon frowned. “But there are five <em>other</em> songs.”</p>
<p>                Shuhua swallowed. “Yeah, I know. They didn’t really mention that.”</p>
<p>                “What about Yuqi, then?” asked Miyeon. “Aren’t they ignoring her on your behalf? You’re both Chinese, so I would’ve thought they’d want to support her, too.”</p>
<p>                Heat spread throughout Shuhua’s cheeks. “Oh, I’m sorry. I messed up. They’re not just fans of (G) I-DLE specifically. They’re fans of me…”</p>
<p>                Relief washed over Soyeon’s, Miyeon’s, and even Yuqi’s, faces, and the group split up to pursue whatever activities for the day that they might. As she remained in her seat, Shuhua noticed Minnie and Soojin still looking at her.</p>
<p>                “Oh? Is there something else?”</p>
<p>                They stared at her.</p>
<p>                “I don’t know,” said Minnie. “Is there?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua shook her head. “No, there isn’t.”</p>
<p>                As Minnie and Soojin left, Shuhua looked at her hands as she waited. When she was alone, she took in a deep breath and sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                Later she found Minnie again.</p>
<p>                “Hi.”</p>
<p>                Minnie looked up at her. “Hello…”</p>
<p>                Shuhua sat down next to her. She stayed quiet, staring downward somewhere in the near distance.</p>
<p>                “What’s wrong?” asked Minnie.</p>
<p>                Shuhua snapped her head to the side quickly. “Nothing’s wrong.”</p>
<p>                She tried to hold Minnie’s gaze, but then she turned away, returning to her navel-gazing.</p>
<p>                She felt Minnie’s stare continue for a while.</p>
<p>                “You know you can talk to me if you need to, right?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua glanced over at her quickly, then looked down at her hands. She caught herself blinking rapidly, blushed, and forced herself to nod.</p>
<p>                “You look like you do need to talk,” Minnie said flatly.</p>
<p>                Shuhua hunched her shoulders and put her face in her hands.</p>
<p>                “Hold me.”</p>
<p>                She heard Minnie get up, and shuddered, when she felt Minnie wrap her arms around her shoulders. It felt so good.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                “How would you feel if I left the group?”</p>
<p>                Carefree Yuqi, with her doll-like eyes, was stunned.</p>
<p>                “I…don’t…want you to go…” she stammered.</p>
<p>                “But what if I did?” insisted Shuhua.</p>
<p>                Yuqi froze, staring at Shuhua, until she couldn’t continue any longer and blinked. Tears formed in the corners of her eyes, and her cheeks reddened as she frowned.</p>
<p>                “I would miss you…”</p>
<p>                <em>I’ve never seen her so upset before</em>, thought Shuhua. “I’d miss you, too.”</p>
<p>                “Then, why would you go?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua gave her a hug. “Don’t you know?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                “Would you want me to stay?”</p>
<p>                Soojin didn’t answer right away, lost in thought at the sudden question. When she finally did speak, she gave Shuhua a very serious look.</p>
<p>                “Are you being harassed?”</p>
<p>                <em>Close enough</em>, thought Shuhua. She shook her head.</p>
<p>                “Not exactly, no.”</p>
<p>                Soojin closed her eyes for a moment. “Well, I haven’t quit yet, so if you haven’t been through what I have, then yes, I’d want you to stay. But I respect whatever decision you make.”</p>
<p>                Shuhua smiled faintly. "Thanks, Soojin.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                “I don’t want you to go,” said Miyeon, and Shuhua’s heart was lifted at the desperation in her voice.</p>
<p>                “Why would you even ask that,” continued Miyeon, “if you don’t want to quit?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua shrugged meekly. “I want to know how everyone feels about me, since I’m such a burden on the group.”</p>
<p>                Miyeon’s jaw dropped, then she covered her mouth with her hand. “You’re not a burden. Shuhua!”</p>
<p>                “You sure? I’m costing us money, with the way my fans are…”</p>
<p>                Miyeon grabbed hold of Shuhua’s hands. “That’s not your fault, that’s on them!”</p>
<p>                “Isn’t it, though?” Shuhua blinked back tears. “I’ve done as much in our music as I’ve liked to. But maybe they’re right. Maybe I should work harder, get outside my comfort zone, or something.”</p>
<p>                Miyeon hugged her. “Shuhua, don’t blame yourself. If your fans were mad at you, they wouldn’t be boycotting the album, they’d just stop being fans. Instead, they’re trying to pressure the company into doing what they want. Which isn’t going to work, of course. So they’re in the wrong, you know?”</p>
<p>                “You look so sad,” said Shuhua, and Miyeon held her tight.</p>
<p>                “I am sad. That you’re going through this self-doubt. This pain.”</p>
<p>                “I should just be tougher—” began Shuhua, but the intensity of Miyeon’s response surprised her.</p>
<p>                “No, you can’t do that. You can’t turn everything against yourself!” And she kissed Shuhua on the cheek.</p>
<p>                Shuhua blushed.</p>
<p>                “Miyeon…do you ever regret not debuting in BLACKPINK?”</p>
<p>                Miyeon hesitated. “I don’t know…maybe.”</p>
<p>                “If you had a choice, would you change things? Or would you stay with me—er, with us?”</p>
<p>                Miyeon looked into Shuhua’s eyes, and held her face in her hand, caressing her cheek.</p>
<p>                “I’d stay here with you,” said Miyeon, and she kissed Shuhua on the lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                Now at last Shuhua came upon the final member of the group, and its leader: Soyeon. Shuhua wasn’t interested in asking her the same question she’d asked the others. Something else was bothering her, instead.</p>
<p>                “What are you doing?’ asked Shuhua.</p>
<p>                “I’m trying to think of our next concept, and come up with a new song,” said Soyeon. She was sitting alone at the table, paper and pens at hand, hard at work.</p>
<p>                <em>Do you take me for granted,</em> wondered Shuhua, but she was afraid to ask it. Instead: “What about ash?”</p>
<p>                Soyeon looked at her, confused. “What about it?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua stared. Surely she would’ve thought of it on her own, already? Soyeon was such a prodigy when it came to songwriting, Shuhua admired that greatly about her, even though she was jealous of her, too.</p>
<p>                “We just dropped an album called ‘I Burn.’ Ash is the next logical step, isn’t it?”</p>
<p>                Soyeon rubbed her lips. “Hmm, yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m just not sure what to do with it, though. I mean, it’s bitter, right? And sort of gray, and associated with destruction. But it’s also, like, life-giving, because it makes the soil fertile. So there’s a lot there to go on, but I’m not seeing a way to make a pop song despite that, you know what I mean?”</p>
<p>                It was fascinating to Shuhua whenever she caught the cogs in Soyeon’s brain moving like this. But just this once, Shuhua had an angle that Soyeon had apparently missed.</p>
<p>                “Ash in the mouth,” said Shuhua. “Like food that turns to ash in your mouth. Do you know what that’s representative of?”</p>
<p>                It didn’t take Soyeon long to figure it out.</p>
<p>                “Oh, you mean, like, being disappointed in something you’ve been anticipating? Like hopes and dreams turning to ash?”</p>
<p>                Shuhua nodded. Soyeon chewed on her pen for a bit.</p>
<p>                “Yeah, I can probably make that work, I, I…Shuhua, h-how’d you come up with this?”</p>
<p>                She had a pained expression on her face. Shuhua replied, “I know that’s a saying from somewhere…”</p>
<p>                Soyeon bit her lip. “You’re not depressed, are you?”</p>
<p>                “No, not as far as I know. But when you write the song, could you think of me for the opening part this time?”</p>
<p>                Soyeon looked sheepish. “Yeah, sure thing, Shuhua. Sure thing.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                As she left Soyeon, Shuhua finally managed to feel some contentedness, and she thought back to the events of that day. The most surprising thing was Miyeon’s kiss, and Shuhua had to press her fingers against her own lips at the memory. <em>Shall bloom a flower in my heart,</em> she wished.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I read a news blip about that idiotic boycott like a week ago. I have also read plenty of complaints about her small parts, but I also heard that Shuhua basically chose what she's comfortable with. So I wrote a fic about all that, with a slight amount of inspiration from the song HWAA. I wasn't originally gonna ship anyone, but then it sort of happened. I also thought the story would be longer, but I have been struggling to write this so I had to cut it down to manageable size.</p>
<p>And if you watch behind the scenes videos, Shuhua seems pretty happy being in the group.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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